sometimes you just have to lie

A marriage is based on trust, I know. And I believe in being honest with Josh, communicating with him, being open. But we’ve come to realize, sometimes honesty is not the best policy in our marriage. So we’ve established TWO (and only two!) occasions when it is perfectly acceptable to lie to one another.

#1) A bad haircut. When it’s over and done with and there is nothing we can do except wait for the hair to grow back- we LIE. I tell him he looks great. He tells me I have the face to pull it off. And when six weeks passes and we’ve gained an inch or so back, we tell each other that even though the haircut “didn’t look baaaaad”, we like the other with a little more length.

Hair is a big deal in our household (I’m looking at you JBIgs).

#2) Phone calls. We both kinda hate the phone. I’ve traveled a lot and I know how it is to be away and in a different time zone and so busy, but feeling obligated to call home. I get it.

On the other hand, I’m extremely needy. I require lots of attention, especially from my man. Like seriously. (When I read The Five Languages of Love it was glaringly obvious I speak all five. Need-EEEE). Anyway, the shoe is on the other foot now and Josh is off traveling for work while I stay home alone and eat a can of sour cream & onion Pringles for dinner and watch American Idol. Throughout all this traveling, we’ve learned sometimes we both just have to lie when it comes to calling one another. As in-

“Josh, it’s okay if you can’t call me tonight. Just go and enjoy dinner with your friends and we’ll talk tomorrow.”

But I’m lying. It’s not okay. I hate going to bed without hearing my husband tell me he loves me. I want to hear about his day and tell him I miss him and have his voice be the last thing I hear before falling asleep. I want him to CALL ME!

But I consider it part of the Marriage Sacrifice. It ranks right up there with decorating my house with Citadel pictures and watching sports. I’ve learned to figure it out. I hang anything Citadel in the guest room. I read during all televised sporting events.  I lie when he asks me if it’s okay to talk in the morning.

 The thing is, he always calls. Even when I lie.

That boy knows me too well.