sometimes you just have to lie

A marriage is based on trust, I know. And I believe in being honest with Josh, communicating with him, being open. But we’ve come to realize, sometimes honesty is not the best policy in our marriage. So we’ve established TWO (and only two!) occasions when it is perfectly acceptable to lie to one another.

#1) A bad haircut. When it’s over and done with and there is nothing we can do except wait for the hair to grow back- we LIE. I tell him he looks great. He tells me I have the face to pull it off. And when six weeks passes and we’ve gained an inch or so back, we tell each other that even though the haircut “didn’t look baaaaad”, we like the other with a little more length.

Hair is a big deal in our household (I’m looking at you JBIgs).

#2) Phone calls. We both kinda hate the phone. I’ve traveled a lot and I know how it is to be away and in a different time zone and so busy, but feeling obligated to call home. I get it.

On the other hand, I’m extremely needy. I require lots of attention, especially from my man. Like seriously. (When I read The Five Languages of Love it was glaringly obvious I speak all five. Need-EEEE). Anyway, the shoe is on the other foot now and Josh is off traveling for work while I stay home alone and eat a can of sour cream & onion Pringles for dinner and watch American Idol. Throughout all this traveling, we’ve learned sometimes we both just have to lie when it comes to calling one another. As in-

“Josh, it’s okay if you can’t call me tonight. Just go and enjoy dinner with your friends and we’ll talk tomorrow.”

But I’m lying. It’s not okay. I hate going to bed without hearing my husband tell me he loves me. I want to hear about his day and tell him I miss him and have his voice be the last thing I hear before falling asleep. I want him to CALL ME!

But I consider it part of the Marriage Sacrifice. It ranks right up there with decorating my house with Citadel pictures and watching sports. I’ve learned to figure it out. I hang anything Citadel in the guest room. I read during all televised sporting events.  I lie when he asks me if it’s okay to talk in the morning.

 The thing is, he always calls. Even when I lie.

That boy knows me too well.

My Reading Life

So, I’ve decided in 2012 I will try to become a more private person. More introspective. To mull over options, choices, ramifications, and possibilities. To think before I act…and blab. To keep the things I hold dearest a little more personal. In keeping with that resolution, I’ve decided it’s time to change this little blog of mine again. To head in a different direction. I am going to start blogging about my reading life. Pat Conroy, my absolute favorite author of all time, wrote a book titled My Reading Life and I LOVED it. So I'm stealing his idea. Plus, I read A LOT. So I figure I'll have plenty to say. Still personal, but I think it supports my resolution quite nicely.
I’m a HUGE lover of books. I read anything and everything and I like them all. Non-fiction is so inspiring. So exciting. I love to read something true, to be affected by it, to know this thing or person or event really happened and changed something in some way, changes me in many cases. Fiction is even better. To me, it all seems so….possible. Even the impossible.
I always read the last word first. Always.  
So, here is my 2012 Reading Life so far: I started with Stephen King’s 11/22/63. As a lover of both fiction and non-fiction, nothing could please me more than when they both collide on the same page. All 900 pages were incredibly imaginative and accurate. I LOVED every word and finished it in 2.5 days. Historical fiction amazes me anyway. The research it requires!! So impressive.
Next I read Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. This book is so quirky and smart and heartbreaking and uplifting. Jonathan Safran Foer, the author, is Extremely Witty and Incredibly Talented. I love his style and cannot wait to read Everything is Illuminated later this week. I have a feeling the movie is going to be good, but in a totally different way.  The book is just weird. In a deliciously intelligent, inventive way. I have a feeling the movie may be watered down.

And this brings us to Born to Run. This is a non-fiction book written by Christopher McDougall. My dad gave it to me for Christmas and when I opened it I thought…hmmm, interesting. At the very least I expected it to reinvigorate my running workouts. But I wasn’t DYING to pick it up and read it right away. Today I did pick it up and have quickly decided it may actually be THE most interesting book I’ve ever read!! I’m only 20 pages in, but I’m already hooked. I followed Josh around the house this morning reading aloud and discussing the interesting-ness of it all. I can’t wait to finish it.

I’ll let ya know how it goes!

Rubies

I started reading Extremely Loud and Incredible Close today. I knew it would make me cry before I even began. But I didn't know I would fall in love with it so quickly. I love every quirky line so far. Especially this part:


"When I was your age, my grandfather bought me a ruby bracelet. It was too big for me and would slide up and down my arm. It was almost a necklace. He later told me that he had asked the jeweler to make it that way. Its size was supposed to be a symbol of his love. More rubies, more love. But I could not wear it comfortably. I could not wear it at all. So here is the point of everything I have been trying to say. If I were to give you a bracelet, now, I would measure your wrist twice."