Game Changer

So I really didn’t think I’d be blogging again until after the Holidays, but I’m pretty sure my b.f. Flynn just changed my life.

Let me backtrack for a moment.

 I’ve realized in recent months that I can come across a little…self-involved when I blog. I always seem to be talking about how blessed I am, how amazing my husband is, my family is, my friends are, and on and on and on. I definitely do not mean to be gloating when I say these things, but it may very well seem like I am. I do not want to come across this way.

The thing is I have never really had anything bad happen to me. Truly bad. I have, however, been witness to some of the most important people in my life experiencing deep sorrow and tragedy. And while I ache for loved ones when they are going through difficult times, I have never had to directly experience real heartache. And that is where I believe my compulsion to shout my blessings from every rooftop was born. I feel this need to express my gratitude and acknowledge my blessings because I think I’ll lose them otherwise.

I’ve known this about myself for a long time. I just wasn’t sure how to stop it.

And then, I’m sitting on the porch yesterday, watching the rain fall & chatting with Flynn when all the sudden she says: “Keri, your life is pretty great right now. Maybe it’s your opportunity to really nurture the people around you. To be a nurturer for the people in your life.”

And the rain stopped and the heavens parted and I saw the light.

What Flynn so simply stated instantly changed my perspective. It allowed me, right then & there, to begin to own my happiness. To stop treating it as this fragile thing that must be exclaimed and fussed over in order to survive. That instead of being so afraid of losing  my happiness, I should be afraid of squandering it.

My little Flynnie, so profound sometimes!

So here's to 2012! A year I hope is full of happiness, but more importantly, a year full of opportunities to use that happiness in meaningful ways.

Merry Christmas y’all!

My Christmas Card List

So, this Christmas Season has been a little different in the Metje/Billig household.
 

I didn’t put up a tree this year. When I announced my decision to skip on the decorating I thought Josh was going to either check me in to the ER or the Psych ward.  

I didn’t shop. Usually I LOVE going to a busy mall at Christmas- the people, the music, the line for Santa.  But, I was in a car accident last week. So I had to drive this really big and really ugly rental car. I basically tried to avoid driving all together and did a lot of my shopping on-line. My rental, my driving anxiety, and Atlanta parking kept me home.

And I didn’t go to one single Christmas party. I found out after I booked my flight home, I’d be missing THREE Christmas parties down in Atlanta. No party dresses, no $10 and under gifts, no peppermint or cinnamon rimmed drinks. Sad!

And so, I found myself seriously lacking in Christmas cheer...until I sat down and started my Christmas cards the other day. I love writing Christmas cards. I turn it into a whole production with spread sheets and color coding and assembly lines. It’s fun for me. But the best part is looking over my Christmas Card List. Reflecting on all the names that makeup that list and how they are significant to me, to Josh, to US.

Most of the people on my list I’ve known for 20 years or so. It includes the boy I held hands with in 3^rd grade and the boy I was cruel to in 8^th. It includes the girl I stole my parents’ car with the summer before 9^th grade and the girl who told on me to my parents. On that list are three friends expecting babies and two new mothers. I addressed the card to my best friend and her fiancé for the very last time, next year’s card will read Mr. & Mrs. Five more friends will tie the knot next year.

There are the boys who helped Josh survive Knob year, the boys he got into trouble with in high school, and all his family members who are now mine. Cards were sent to the Carolinas, California, Missouri, and Tennessee. People we’ve worked with, laughed with, fought with, and grown up with. That list is like a roll call for those who have made our lives full and happy.

I hope your Christmas Card List is long this year & your Christmas Season full of love!

Thank you for reading this little blog of mine. I’ll catch ya in 2012.

XOXO