Days 57 & 58

Alright, now for Sunday! It is twice the crying, twice the…fun?

It starts with friends of the family, Barbara and Ken Frank. Barbara and Ken are friends of my parents, but they are also very special to me. To know them is to love them. They both have big smiles and a wonderful zest for life. When Josh & I were engaged Barbara sent me one of the nicest gifts I’ve ever received- the sixpence she carried on her wedding day 30 years before. She passed it down to me to carry on my own wedding day. I cherish that sixpence and will cherish Barbara forever for such a special gift. Ken gave me a different gift for my wedding- endless hugs. Ken gives these big, bone crushing hugs and I got plenty of them over the course of my wedding celebration. He hugged me hello, hugged me goodbye, hugged me at the bar, hugged me when I passed him in the hall, hugs, hugs, hugs. It was wonderful. He made me feel so special and I will never forget either of them for helping me to celebrate my marriage in such a special way.

Lately, I have remembered them in my prayers as Ken recovers after suffering a spinal stroke this week. On Sunday, I went to his Caring Bridge site to leave a message for them both and I couldn’t get through it without crying.  It is so hard for me to imagine Ken sick. He is smiley and happy and lively. It hurts my heart to know what he is going through and for Barbara as she stands by his side. I tried to leave an upbeat, encouraging message, something worthy of Ken & Barbara. I’m not sure I did, but as I thought about my memories of Ken, my tears stopped. And true to form, he had me smiling in no time.

So after leaving Ken & Barbara a message I went to call my grandparents and wish Grandma Metje a Happy Mother’s Day. I think I’ve mentioned that she is suffering from Alzheimer’s… or rather WE are suffering from her Alzheimer’s. While my family struggles with this disease she is happy as a clam lately. Nothing bothers her and she loves to tell me all the things she had to eat at dinner, about the birds in the backyard, and the weather. That woman loves to talk about the weather. So on Sunday we went through the normal topics, food, birds, weather, but something was different. She didn’t know who I was. She couldn’t remember when I tried telling her who my dad was or where I live. She couldn’t remember when Grandpa got out pictures and showed her my face. She simply could not remember me. I told her it was okay, that all she needed to know was that I was someone who loved her & wished her a Happy Mother’s Day.  She was fine with this. She thanked me for calling and giggled and said she would just have to take me by my word that I was someone who loved her. And I hope she did. I barely made it off the phone before going into major breakdown mode, but I am proud that I held it together while we talked. I wouldn’t want to do anything to disturb her happiness, her blissful state of unawareness.