Day 72

On Sunday I arrived to work in a pretty good mood. That all changed when I logged onto my e-mail. See, while I am currently working in Portland for my old boss, I was originally supposed to be working in L.A. WITH my old boss…and my two best friends….and every single person I love from my old job. They are ALL there in L.A. working while I train a new employee in Portland. To be fair, my boss did call and ask if I would be willing to make this change and I did agree, so I really can’t complain. But I am anyway. Because I am sooooo sad I have to miss seeing everyone I used to work with and I have to be here in rainy old Portland and all my L.A. co-workers keep posting and texting and e-mailing me pictures of all the fun they are having and it makes me want to scream. Or jump on a plane to L.A. Or just go home and cry.

In addition to all the fun I am missing out on in L.A. I am also missing out on the following back home in VA:

A Wedding Shower

A Baby Shower

A Birthday Party

A Memorial Day Gathering

In my last month of spending time in Charlottesville with friends and family, I am missing everything to work or house hunt in Atlanta. So instead of opening all these party invites and fun pictures with excitement, I open them with a very heavy heart. I feel left out. I feel panicked at how little time I have left in Virginia. I feel sad.

So on Sunday, when I opened all these RSVPs and beach cookout pictures I just blinked up at these ugly fluorescent convention center lights and willed myself not to cry. And it worked. I lasted allllll day without crying. Then I went back to my hotel room and let it all out.